Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Catalinos Liberitos

Got a full dose of liberty with the pilgrims over at Riviera Skateboards. Took the water buggy out to Catalina for a Cinco de Mayo skate/brew/cig/swim/sunburn/budlightmargs savage dude ranch ash trash loose your wallet weekend in the most beautiful place 26 miles away from smelLA. The super moon got everyone hot under the collar. Even the galley server at the express was casually talking about Ted Bundy, severed heads and the allure of a mass murderer. Perfect lunch talk, thanks buddy. It was a burning hearts night with the Mayor, Joey Mash, Ben Harper, Nizzy, J Ro the warrior god, Kill Mumma and a bunch of unsuspecting travelers with traveling attitudes. It was a sweat stained shmorgesborg of well behaved seniors and psychotic sailors. Everyone and everything was in full effect. When in doubt order another calamari sampler. I found myself in some graveyard under the werewolf super moon illuminating the sky and dancing to Bob Segar with Joey Mash and some lunatics. Buddha danced with us too. Leopard skin skies and crocodile laden earth made the for the most interesting dance floor I ever suede shoe tip toe tapped. Woke up from dreaming wondering who had we been. Sausage, coffee, eggs scrambled nice and cheesy for me. We found the Mayor in a bad, bad place. Scurried up the hill just in time to see a leather outfitted dude on a skate table blast through the hay bale, slam into a babe in a string bikini strait outta Pam Anderson bay watch days. Boobies flew like that 80s movie Porkies. Old creeps immediately retreated to the nearest bush and were never seen again. After paying our due respects to the Prince of Catalina, J-Ro, we cashed our checks and made it back to the mainland. Things haven't been the same. Super Moon, Calamari, Island Fever or was it that sick bastard galley waiter who poisoned us? Still living in fear.

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